Visper Karr; "OMGHP"

[Black Bullitt]

Fade in, close to the ground. A pair of wrestling shoes, topped with purple-grey kicker pads and long black pants draping over them, walk into frame. The camera pans up, and just above the knee, the pants cut off to reveal a pair of soft, finely shaped milky-brown legs. Panning up more, a pair of ratty old gym shorts - known as the Globally Honored Pants in some circles - appear. Panning up still farther, a slim waist clad in black spandex, and going farth--

[Visper:] That’s far enough.

… Damn. So close. ~_~

The camera pulls back, and once at a safe distance completes its pan upward, showing the new Globally Honored Pants-wearer, Visper Karr, arms crossed over her chest. She gives the camera - or maybe the cameraman? - a very suspect look (like this one; ¬_¬) but relaxes and takes a deep breath. She snaps the elastic waist band of the Globally Honored Pants and smiles.

[Visper:] At New Year’s Special, I did something in McPro that many think couldn’t be done; I beat Holly. And I didn’t just beat her; I beat her for the Globally Honored Pants. This may be seen by some as a minor accomplishment, but there are other things to take into account here. Namely, who else has managed to defeat Holly in the past year? If I recall correctly, only Jo Ryder, former OG-Joshi Champion Dizzy, and myself. I’d say that puts me in some pretty good company. In fact, the woman who claims herself to be the "Queen of Professional Wrestling" hasn’t beaten Holly. But, I have. So, maybe I have something that the Queen of Professional Wrestling doesn’t.

Visper looks down, then smiles.

[Visper:] Oh, wait. I do; the Globally Honored Pants!

Visper is all smiles, and then tries her best to have a seriousface.

[Visper:] Now, I must say, that the past couple years have been wonderful for me. When I started doing announcing for New Damage Prowrestling, I never thought that I would’ve been attracted to the sport of professional wrestling as much as I have become. I never imagined that I would be able to pick it up so quickly, but I must contribute that to my trainers; Jo Ryder, Twinky McLanahan, Juli Tanaka, and even The Man; Chapel Hillcrest. Without them, I wouldn’t have been called the face to watch in 2006. I wouldn’t have been called a break-out star in OG-Joshi. I would not have been given an opportunity to wrestle former WWE Women’s Champion Victoria in a trial match for the largest wrestling promotion in the world. And, I never would have made it to where I am today; in Twinky McLanahan’s Globally Honored Pants.

Visper tries, but can’t hide a very coy smile.

[Visper:] 2006 might be the Year of the Dog, but it’s also the Year of Visper Karr. The Globally Honored Pants was just the beginning.

Fade out.

[orochigeese]

*Holly is sitting on a chair...yeah, that's it...that's the freaking setup!*

*Holly begins twitching a bit*

Holly: "Visper Karr...Visper Karr...you...you are absolutely right..."

Holly: "This IS the year of the dog...the female dog...the BITCH. That bitch is ME! This is MY year...the year of Holly...the year of Bitch-Jitsu!"

Holly: "I will get my title back...those pants belong around MY shapely thighs and ass...NOT YOURS!"

Holly: "Not that you have shapely thights or that I look or...UGH!"

*Holly begins twitching further in frustration but then begins to calm her self down*

Holly: "Fact is...you are in greater company then you think...and i'm not talking about the "I got a cheap win over Holly" club like those Team Ryder ho's."

*Holly begins taking out a small notebook*

Holly: "I'm talking about the "I'm on Holly's SHIT list" club!"

*Holly opens the book and begins writing in it*

Holly: "Visper Karr...you are the latest entry in my "Shit list" club...aka "the I WILL GET EVEN WITH" club.

*Holly shows the book to the camera and we can see NUMEROUS entries...pages after pages of people, places, and things that Holly has written the names of.*

Holly: "You'll notice that a lot of the people have their names crossed out. That singifies that I did in fact, get even with them. Whores like Jo Ryder and Akino Hirai are the most recent "crossed off" entries.

Holly: "You...you have gotten the Joshi world's attention with your "victory" over me. But much more importantly and fatal to your career...you have gotten MY attention. So whether it's in McPro or OG-Joshi...I will make an example of you and show everyone that in 2006 I will be even MORE successful then I was in 2005."

Holly: "And to do that, I have to go through you and get my title back. Next time we're in the ring, you'll see a Holly that will be more vicious then you could ever imagine!"

Holly: "You say beating me might seem like a minor accomplishment!?"

*Holly begins shaking in anger again*

Holly: "The only accomplishment you need to concern yourself with next time is SURVIVING ME"

*Holly quickly gets up and throws the chair at the wall and walks away. The camera zooms in at the final page of Holly's "shit list"*


Part of Holly's "Shit list"
-------------------------

240. Associated Wheatgrass
241. Sony
242. "The Clucking chicken"
243. Finland
244. The Discovery Channel
245. Cheaply made notebo (there's a rip here)
246. Sirloin...Patty Sirloin
247. Boneless Chicken
248. People with tans
249. 1720 A.D.
250. AM radio stations
251. People without tans
252. Comets
253. The Pacific Ocean
254. Visper Karr

[Black Bullitt]

Fade in to Visper standing in front of a bare wall. Instead of her ring gear, she's wearing casual clothing - eggshell white undershirt, jeans and a jean jacket, and a black scarf - her dark purple lips smiling (what? She likes purple lipstick, shaddup). And, natch, the Globally Honored Pants over her jeans.

[Visper:] Now, Holly, you seem to be resentful of something. And, hey, I can understand. Losing sucks. But, I don't think beating you was "minor"; it's the biggest win of my career so far! And I do respect what you've done in this business in the last year. Hell, even I have my problems with Joann...

Visper's look wanders off slightly, but she shakes her head and refocuses.

[Visper:] ...but don't get it twisted, blondie; your "Bitch-Jitzu" is nothing compared to my Kick-You-In-The-Face Fu. You might get off shoving people's heads into your bikini, but I get my kicks IN YOUR FACE.

Visper smiles, and after a second the smiles drops to a look of disappointment.

[Visper:] ... Ya get it? I get my "kicks"... and I use kicks... in your face? It... It's a joke, Holly.

Visper shakes her head and looks off camera.

[Visper:] Nice girl, but about as sharp as a bowling ball.

Visper looks back to the camera.

[Visper:] Holly, you can put me on your "shit list", you can swear revenge upon me and my house for generations to come-- you can even prank call Pizza Hut and have 50 pizzas delivered to my house at 1:30 in the morning. But, at the end of the day, I beat you. And the fact that you're in such a tizzy about this means, I win again. Because, you see, you may be thinking nicely about me, or you may be thinking poorly about me, but you're still thinking about me.

And I can't say whether or not the McBlackMage Office will give you another chance to get into my Globally Honored Pants, but I can bet that you'll be sweating profusely at the opportunity to.

Fizade, playa. Cuz I be all stereotypically black, and shiz.